#wtrends13 liveblog Act 4: Falling action

The motion for the traditional afternoon debate: “Offices don’t work, they’re a waste of space”. Paul Morrell – actually before the accident, Brad Pitt, former President of the British Council for Wasted Space – speaking in favour, kindly reminded everyone that I lost the debate to him last year, which is not supposed to happen. The counselling has been going well.

Its scientifically impossible – proven by one of the Doc’s formulae – to be funnier than Paul. Only he could get away with showing a picture of kangaroos in flagrante delicto and not get a call from the Palace demanding the OBE back. He did however unknowingly quote the Global Institute of Nowhere. And not many people do.

Paul Finch is funny too. But not as funny as Paul. And he does look like a Bolshevik. And he won. Like the Bolsheviks. You see, history has a habit of repeating itself.

Its the darkest, coldest slot of the day following the debate – credit to Pauls Bartlett and Fawcett for taking it, even if they didn’t have a choice. A deep dive into crystal field theory may have been a brave decision. The simulation model revealed another tool to increase workstation occupancy levels and drive out waste, the dread that is “optimisation”. One cannot but help be frightened by this – in an Orwellian destruction of language kind of way. “Human as widget” as Monica Parker tweeted despairingly. Dionysus may make us uncomfortable with his emotional saturation, but it is Apollo we need to fear.

“We don’t need these mathematics” rang a dissenting voice from Sweden. Drama in truth, truth in drama.

GP’s working open plan? “What’s the problem, sir? Speak up! Its fine, you’re collaborating”. But a direct reference to the inspiration for the works to the building in which we are sitting provided by one of my two dramatic sidekicks for the day, Apollo, for sterling work in curing the plague. Amid the extensive work they found demonic symbology on the floor when renovating the building, denoting that workplace consultants had been there before. And, a resident ghost, the architect of the original structure, quite uncharacteristically hanging around to help people understand and use their creation.

Or perhaps it is the fading visage of the humanity being squeezed from the workspace by the over-appliance of science, protesting to anyone who will acknowledge that we are humans, not binary code.

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